Yes, I am a Stay-At-Home-Mother

The mind is all over the place.

Things to do. Words to read. Lists to write. Plans to lay out. Schedules to follow. Conversations to initiate. Issues to think about. Emails to respond to. Little bodies and minds to nourish.

Somehow, I managed to pull out this collection of photos from some of my recent Tweets, and place them here to make these ramblings more readable.

A stay-at-home-mother. I am one now, till the end of the year at least.

It is a privilege I relish. To have all the time to be with my children. To enjoy every baby chuckle, and endure every sleepless night.

Make no mistake, I know I really am doing this more for me than for them. Kids are adaptable and more resilient than we give them credit for, truly. I know they don't really need their mummy 24/7, even if Bubbles insists so, and offers to grow vegetables so that we can save money to live on one income :) Should I have chosen to work full-time, leaving them in the care of trustworthy caregivers, I am certain they would also flourish. Many families have done it that way, to beautiful outcomes.

But then I would have to hear about Bubbles' funny sayings second hand. Or watch Bun taking her first assisted steps on video. There would be less time for cuddles, flopping around on beds, and crazy singing at the top of our lungs.

Less time for comparing feet sizes while chuckling, trying out funky hairstyles, taking long, uninterrupted walks - twice a day. To pray with them. To hold their little hands. Less time to spare for all the things children simply need time to do. To spin long stories. To help them (help me) with chores. To learn grown-up things.

Perhaps they wouldn't come to me for comfort, or allow me to put them to bed. Maybe they wouldn't have memories of mummy being around for all those special times that they remember.

More importantly, there will be less opportunity to capture influencing moments. For just-in-time teaching, guiding, explaining. To show the wonderful, and to allay childish fears. To model values that I want them to adopt.

I lament about temper tantrums, the frazzled nerves from non-stop demands, and the constant blurry cloud in my mind from lack of sleep. I do. I do get grouchy, and roll my eyes. I do yearn to have more time for leisure.

But then I chose to do this. I chose to set aside these few critical years where it will be more about them than me. I chose, after sitting down with Roboman to work out our sums, and I need to remember. When remembering, I am glad I chose this. I am so every grateful that I can. Not without sacrifices, but still, an option.

And so, I cherish.

The days, the time, the experiences.

I wipe away tears and dole out hugs and kisses. They must know they are loved. No matter what. Not just by me, but by the family they belong to, and most of all, by their Father God.

Then I create sweet smells from the kitchen that will hopefully create beautiful imprints on their memories.

Linking up with The Playful Parents


lilsnooze said...

Thank you for this wonderful reminder. Being at home is really a privilege yet it can work the other way, when the children are not "compliant".

And I am sure your stay-home days will be great memories for you all.

Hai Fang / rachel said...

hey sharon, this is such a beautiful piece. To be able to choose, is indeed a privilege and Bubbles such a sweetie to offer to grow vege to help save money :)

Miss Leney said...

Being a SAHM is honestly not for everyone. And for those who chose to be a SAHM, i truly take my hat off them, and you :) Because I know it's no mean feat. However, no matter how hard it is, it comes with an abundance reward of love. Nothing beats being home with your children and seeing them grow and reach milestones infront of your eyes. All the firsts and so much more. Beautiful post and kudos to you my friend. :)

Corsage@A Dollop Of Me said...

Yes, and I am sure you fully understand as you are also on a stint! :)

Hai Fang:
Thank you! Yes, Bubs is always thinking of ways to persuade me not to go back to work.

Thanks babe. I fully agree it is not for everyone! In fact, I realised that I didn't take to it as well as I expected myself to. And it is always better to have a happy mother (stay home or not), than a ultra frazzled one, unhappy on a daily basis.

mummybean said...

I'm late in reading this, but thanks for the sweet reminder. I am enjoying being at home with the kids - there are so many teachable moments that pop up in a day. moments to mold character, teach them about God, allay their fears. I treasure these. At the same time there are unproductive days, the tantrum-y days, the days when everything is better when everyone packed off to bed. But ultimately I know I'm doing it for me too. Press on!