I had dinner out with a girlfriend last night. We had planned this a while ago, and I really wanted to make sure I could catch her before she leaves again for one of her gruellingly long work trips.
When I dropped Bubbles off in the morning, I told her that Mummy would be picking her up later that night, after she has had her milk and changed to her PJs. She nodded solemnly in agreement.
Sometime in the evening, I realised with horror that I can't quite remember when was the last time I went out for dinner on my own! This friend, therefore, was the perfect companion to be with, as it was breath of fresh air to talk about everything else other than Mummy-dom matters. (Although talk of Bubbles did creep in =P) I always tell her that I live vicariously through her experiences, given that I now live a relatively structured life that centers around family.
One part of our conversation stuck in my mind: She mentioned that I no longer write about me, my thoughts, experiences etc as a person. Of course I thoroughly disagreed with her (that can't be!) but when I came back to scroll through my entries, I realised she is quite right. It would seem as if I am mother first before anything else, even myself.
There's nothing wrong with that in itself of course, and I am sure this is a phase that many other women go through as well. However, I do think that it will be nice to take a day out each week for me to pen my thoughts about me as a woman. It could be random posts about what I wear, what I think about flowers, photos of my morning, making things like these, or this, or snippets about Roboman and our marriage.
A space for me to indulge in being first a woman. In order to be a better wife and a mother. Perhaps some of you also feel the same way?
This post will kickstart it I guess!
Here are some photos of the evening:
(all photos taken by the girlfriend. I didn't have a camera with me)
How do you like my dress?
I am TERRIBLE at posing.
The girlfriend had to teach me how :)
I think I have some fats to shed,
will work on that after I have all the kids I want :)
Friend rolled eyes when I ordered this hot and sour soup.
I can't seem to go without spicy food.
Sea Perch
Asked for it to be spicy too.
We preferred the asparagus that came with it.
We unceremoniously dunked rice into this to soak up the gravy.
Very nice :)
There was more food, but I am not bothered to post.
I will post her pearl necklace that I tried on for fun though.
I've been wanting to get something like that for the longest time!
19 comments:
You look good with the pearl necklace on you.
you look good. period. life is about everything! share what you want to on this space, no matter!
i forgot to ask! what did Bubbles say when she saw you last night? did she still agree to you going gallivanting? :P
vavavoom! (Archie's eyes bulging out with delight when he sees Veronica or Jughead's eyes bulging out when he sees a hamburger). You look hawt, even without a head :P
Sunflower:
Yay! I am quite convinced about getting one now. I might make one if I can spare some time to do so!
Imp:
You reminded me about being me! I don't want to lose that. Err the bub was VERY tired when we got home. Eyelids threatening to close. Still, because she didn't see me in the evening, she held them open, pulled out 6 storybooks, sat on my lap and said "Mummy read!" LOL She slept soon after, thankfully!
goolypop:
You crack me up, woman! The headless part probably contributes to the hawtness =P Gosh, it has been ages since I've read Archie comics! We're definitely from the same era ;)
Food looks gorgeous and so do you! (Or at least the part of you which is featured.)
You definitely have less fats than I do, so don't fret about it! And yes, a woman first then a wife and mother. You can't love others if you can't love yourself. :)
Oh! We share the same sentiments about shedding he kilos AFTER having all the kids that we want to. Meanwhile, indulge all we can! :P
Looking good there! Both you and the food, hee. I think it's important to be a woman and wife first, because that'll make you a better mother!
I can identify with what you wrote. Like you, I've started indulging myself a little now, because I've come to realise it's so important not to forget about who we are even after we become moms. And you look good in that blue dress, and the pearl necklace is nice on you! Btw, I really like you blog and have added you to my blogroll :)
Shellylives:
But you've had TWO bubs and I only one! :) YOU are inspiring with your determination with the gymming!
Anya's Mom:
Haha, well the difference is that you've gone on with that 'having all you can' and I haven't! LOL. Take care, you!
Jane:
The friend took the pics! I agree that we have to first take care of ourselves to be equipped to care for others. Mothers tend to fall into caring for everyone else first all the time, and themselves last and only if there's spare time! I feel I get that way and then burn out!
Ruth:
Thanks for dropping by and for adding me to your blogroll. I'm going to check out your site right now!
You look hot! I can't recall the last time I was out with gal friends..
The thing with becoming a mother is you do lose your identity to the kids, and it really is a conscious effort to rediscover that identity.
Kinda tough when you're with them 24/7 like I am but I'm hoping to "rediscover myself" (that sounds so esoteric when you put it that way) when they go to school next year! hahaha
I am struggling with the same too - My life right now feels very consumed with motherhood (and work) I have very little time/energy left for myself! I guess it's hard when our kids are so young and still need us to be around all the time. But thanks for the reminder to find some 'me' time though :)
You look awesome and I don't think you have any fat to shed! You look great the way you are now and like I said, i love your dress! I was thinking the same the other day that I was afraid that I would lose my identity as a woman/ self after giving birth and get totally consumed with the best interest of little one, husband or everyone else, like i always do. Perhaps this is a good way to remind ourselves that. Cheers for that, great idea.
Ah, this definitey strikes a chord with me. So so true, esp with 2 children now!
I should be inspired to blog more about me too!
And I like how you always seem to jazz up outfits with belts or corsages.
Daphne:
And you clearly make that conscious effort! It is definitely more challenging for you since you are a full-time SAHM. I do it part-time and I already find it tough!That said, I think you're doing a great job, and you've even kept your wicked sense of humour, kids or no kids!
olimomok:
Consumed, we are! I've never been a person that thrives on routine, but I have no choice but to keep to one now as it is the only way for the juggling to be possible! At least we know that this is just a phase. A season in life that will pass all so quickly!
Leney:
You are too kind babe! I'm actually giving away a few awesome dresses for Project Spare Attire simply because I can't fit into them anymore! I say pamper yourself now. People say the 1st pregnancy is often all about the mother. Lap up the attention and me-time :)
Lilsnooze:
Oh yes! I'm closely watching all you moms with 2 or more kids and then deciding when I dare take the plunge! LOL! Yes, I do have almost as many belts as I do corsages. heh heh. They help hide the jelly belly!
What other poses did you learn? I wanna learn too... hehe.. must ask your teacher!
Yup, this is your space and you can share anything you want or even anything random. I'm looking forward to more of your 'Me' posts in time to come.
LadyJ:
Wahhah! Yes at your next 'date' you can learn from her! ;) I was laughing too much that day, and feeling rather embarrassed to be learning anything more. The waitresses were staring at us!
Beautiful, corsage. An epitome of elegance and grace. And the pearl necklace looks great on you. I feel all ladies should own a set of pearl jewellery. it's timeless and nv goes out of style. and I totally relate to the part where we are a mom first before anything else. glad you have such a grt gf who keep you in check. so we are looking forward to more posts just about Corsage! ^^
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